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A Guide to Healing Your Inner Child

Updated: Nov 16, 2021



Self-care has become a more popular topic of discussion in society in recent times. Therapists and healthcare providers share a wide variety of methods to calm anxiety and manage everyday stressful situations.


However, trauma and fears can be deeply rooted, going all the way back to our childhoods. Our inner child may be screaming out for acceptance, comfort, and love. It can be challenging to unearth our past and heal our inner child, but here’s how you can get started:


Acknowledge the presence of your inner child


To start any sort of healing, you must first acknowledge the presence of your inner child. It might seem silly, but it’s helpful to talk to them as if they’re sitting with you at the moment. Giving them an identity can help you work through issues together while saying self-affirmative phrases to yourself while visualizing your younger, wounder self can help you find the recognition you needed as a child.


If staring into a mirror and talking to yourself doesn’t work out, you can also journal your thoughts and feelings or communicate them as letters to your younger self. The main goal of this communication is to provide feelings of affirmation and validation that your younger self missed out on for so long.


Validate your past


It’s not helpful for your mental health to shove down issues or brush them under the rug to pretend they don’t exist. They’re going to remain there under the surface, coming out long enough to affect your thoughts and feelings without you realizing it.


It’s necessary to stay realistic of your past experiences of abuse, neglect, or any other form of childhood trauma. Take your time to understand everything you went through by going over traumatic events in detail. This can also mean that they may have to sit through difficult feelings of guilt or shame to trace their roots. It’s best to get professional mental health help when going down that painful memory lane.


Identify the form of your neglect


Even if you grew up in an idyllic environment, it is completely possible to have wounds that still cause pain. Most trauma originates from some form of neglect, which can range anywhere from feeling like you’re not receiving enough love or freedom to wishing you had more protection.


Sit with those painful feelings and put a name to them before considering the events that surround them in order to create a clear picture of the events.


Identify how your past hurts are affecting your present life


Your past might lead you to engage in self-sabotaging patterns in the present. For example, you might project your feelings of distrust onto people who genuinely care about you because you’re too afraid they will betray you, and you’ll end up alone again.


It’s important to identify how your pain is manifesting in the present in order to move forwards and shift towards healthier habits.



Look for professional individual therapy services


Talking to highly experienced mental health therapists, such as those at Stem Wellness, can help you explore your childhood trauma and learn ways to cope and heal. Dr. Stempel uses a variety of techniques such as emotionally focused therapy (EFT) and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) to help people implement meaningful change and is a certified clinical supervisor in the state of New Jersey.


Our services include psychotherapy counseling, marriage or relationship counseling, individual therapy, and family therapy in New Jersey.


Contact us to book an appointment today.

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