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Feeling Lonely Even When You’re Not Alone? Here’s What You Can Do

Americans have been facing an epidemic separate from COVID-19—the epidemic of loneliness. Further exacerbated by the ongoing pandemic, people are lonelier than ever in this day and age.

According to a recent study, it’s suggested that the quality of one’s relationships affects their loneliness more than the quantity. As such, people can feel terribly lonely even when they’re not alone. If you’re feeling lonely or empty while in a relationship, remember that it’s still an emotion you can overcome!

Understand why you feel lonely

Understanding the reasoning behind your loneliness is the first step in curing it. Feeling lonely while surrounded by people is completely normal—all humans struggle with intermittent loneliness, with loss, stress, or trauma intensifying those feelings.

If you suffer from depression, anxiety, or low self-esteem, you may have an external locus of control that makes you rely on external factors in order to feel complete. Take a closer look at your relationship—are most of your needs being met? Do you feel safe being yourself around your partner? Communication or attachment problems can often lead to feelings of loneliness in a relationship.

Retrain your thinking patterns

Your recurring thoughts largely influence your feelings. Take control of your negative self-talk and practice associating things with more positive emotions. You can start thinking of alone time as a time to reflect, grow, and connect with your inner self. Chronic loneliness often leads to never-ending rumination, but healthy solitude is great for focusing your clarity and improving cognition.

Be compassionate to yourself

Partake in activities that focus on self-compassion to combat your feelings of loneliness. You can practice associating alone time with mediation, physical activity, or mindful walks to look forward to spending time by yourself instead of dreading it.

Taking care of your physical health with compassion and patience can also help you build a better bond with your inner self, easing the feelings of loneliness. Remember that you are worthy of love, and your partner is with you because they’re able to appreciate that.

Communicate with your partner

If the feelings of loneliness persist while you’re in a relationship, it’s best to make your partner aware of what you’re going through. You may discover that the loneliness is due to a communication gap or consistently unmet needs. Discuss your needs and wants with your significant other and give them a chance to improve the relationship dynamic. Ask yourself what each of you brings to the relationship and how you can make it better.

Get couple’s therapy services

Not every problem needs to be tackled alone. Relationships are supposed to add to your happiness, not make you feel sad and alone. Mental health counselors at Stem Wellness can help provide a safe space to communicate with your partner in order to share your thoughts and feelings and build a stronger connection.

Our services include individual counseling, family therapy, and marriage or relationship counseling in New Jersey.

Contact us to book an appointment today.

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